Don't answer that question! It's a trap!
Why we all need to give our questions, and ourselves, a day off
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I took yesterday off.
No big deal, right? I mean it was a holiday here for those of us in the US of A to pay tribute and remember those who died in military service to defend and protect the freedoms we enjoy in our country. The day has become one of backyard barbeques and pool parties, but isn’t that part of what a free society should embody - a chance to throw off the shackles of our need to do and succeed in the world and just be, at least for one day?
I honestly mean it when I say, “Thank you veterans, for the freedom and ability to put down my cares and concerns for at least one day out of the year.”
For those who may not know, I have about three or four jobs that I do. I work fulltime during the week for a media company as an editor. I work part-time for Jubilee! Circle as their Spiritual Director - though I probably put in a fulltime amount of hours, because a pastor’s job never truly ends. I also have other side jobs such as doing piecemeal work for a past employer, other writing projects and keeping up this blog for all my subscribers, both paid and free.
Honestly, I often spend 10 to 12 hours a day in front of my computer doing work that I seem to have made for myself out of nothing! Yesterday, I deliberately did not do any of that. I didn’t even sit in front of my computer for 5 minutes.
Instead, I spent the morning with my partner, Beth. I made us breakfast and we sat out on the back deck in the cool morning air eating, talking, laughing and loving each other. She went off to work on an art project and I took the dogs out for a 3 mile walk. (My left calf is currently in rebellion about that.) I spent time with one of our musicians from Jubilee! Circle rehearsing some music and watching TV. After he left, I lumped out on the couch and watched more mind and heart expanding content, including a very long, 2-part video of a luthier restoring a Gibson acoustic guitar from the 1950s. So edifying and also clarifying that my sometime dream of being a luthier is not realistic (it seems more tedious than computer work).
(Okay, I did do a quick Motley Mystic Monday Moment on Facebook while I relaxed on the back deck, but it wasn’t really work!)
The whole day was bliss.
The day off came just after I had spent Saturday and Sunday doing an online meditation retreat. There were periods of meditation, but also other programming that expanded my heart, body, mind and spirit and gave me some amazing emotional and spiritual breakthroughs that will take me awhile to unpack. However, while I was out on that calf-bend walk yesterday, my ego piped up and wanted to know what we were going to do after this amazing retreat.
“What’s next?” it asked. “What do we need to do?” It had all sorts of ideas, of course, but one of the things I learned from the retreat was that when the ego asks a question, it’s so much better if you can resist answering it - especially right away, because the ego never asks a question it cannot answer.
Instead, we should let the questions run free for a little while. Just release them to the universe. Ask them. Go ahead. Then imagine them just running around searching for the answer that is its ego-vibration match. This is the profound thing I learned at the retreat: If we answer a question from the same emotional vibration that asked it, we’ll get the ego’s answer - not Spirit’s answer.
So, I let the question rattle around without an answer for a few minutes. What happened was this: A better question emerged.
“How much time do I need to take in silence with Spirit before I answer that question?”
That’s a question worth taking the time to ponder, because if I go sit in the silence of Spirit for little while, the answer that arrives will come from a higher consciousness that asked the question.
I invite you to try this practice. Ask your burning question right now, and deliberately do not answer it. Even if an immediate answer presents itself, do not entertain it. Let the question run free. You may find yourself asking an even deeper question. The best thing to do, though, is simply take some silent time to relax with the Holy while the question bumps around in your head. Let it be frantic. Let it panic a bit, but give the question to Spirit and ask for better, higher-consciousness-generated questions, if not answers. What you will receive, no matter what, is a new perspective.
According to A Course in Miracles, a miracle is simply a fresh way to see and be in the world that you haven’t experienced before. If we’re not in a hurry to answer our questions from the same consciousness that created it, we will find either a higher answer, or a better question that leads to even higher states of consciousness and even better answers.
Or, the question disappears all together, because we finally understand that everything is okay, and questions are all just the ego’s trick to keep us seeking and not finding, anyway.
So, what’s your question? Ask it, and don’t answer it until you take time to check in with Spirit.
The answers may arrive in the form of another question - or you may experience a silence that goes so deep that it extinguishes questions all together. That would be the real miracle - enlightenment - the total end of perception.
Let me know if you tried this and what kind of results you got! (And if you were, indeed, enlightened, I’m going to need specifics …)
Music for the Journey
“Where Is The Love?”
The Black Eyed Peas
About the Motley Mystic:
The Motley Mystic is an online community for people who have realized that the truth speaks with many voices. There is no one religion, philosophy, institution or dogma that captures the whole Truth and nothing but the Truth. No one needs to swear allegiance to one line of thought or belief to discern Truth, because Love is the only thing that’s real. That’s what we explore at the Motley Mystic - all the tools and strategies we need to remove our barriers to Love and live fully as our true, Divine Self.
Candace Chellew is the founder of Motley Mystic as well Jubilee! Circle, an interfaith spiritual community in Columbia, S.C. She is also the author of Bulletproof Faith: A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay and Lesbian Christians published in 2008 by Jossey-Bass. She is also a musician and avid beer drinker.